But the very uncomfortable reality of the situation is that if Gretchen isn't behind the fridge, it means she's elsewhere. You see, it's easier to cope with a mouse if you know exactly where it is and no it is not going anywhere else. It's much more worrying that it is probably elsewhere, exploring, pooing in my slippers (which are presumably very warm and cosy), and making a nest for lots of baby mice somewhere I don't realise until much later on. Here's a list of places Gretchen could be hiding, though I really hope she isn't.
1) The laundry basket. The ironic part of this is that my laundry basket usually sits on a big plastic box which I used to bring my stuff in to Griffith when I moved here. So it was up off the ground and unreachable to any exploring mice. That was until I took the box into the kitchen to use to make a track from the under-sink cupboard to the front door (see earlier post). So for the past few days the laundry basket has been sitting on the floor of the laundry, and it would be a very snug and cosy place for it to hang out.
If Gretchen is in here, it means I am in for one of two shocks:
a) I discover Gretchen when sorting through my laundry and in addition to frightening me into throwing the laundry basket in the air, scattering my laundry with dirty clothes and presumably more mouse poo, Gretchen would probably hide under my washing machine, which is as heavy and difficult to move as my fridge.
b) I don't discover Gretchen when searching through my laundry. I discover her after I've done my laundry, in the bottom of my washing machine, drowned and spun dry. And presumably very clean from all the washing powder I use.
2) In my new guitar. Let me tell you, if Gretchen has made her way into my new guitar all hell is going to break loose. That's a Maton guitar, people. I spent my Rudd stimulus money on that. And I haven't even received my stimulus money yet. If I find mouse poo in my guitar, a marmalade flavoured mouse trap is going to be the best case scenario for Gretchen.
3) Behind the bookcase. Okay, that's far from a bad scenario. A bookcase would be a good place for Gretchen to be hiding. It would be easy to clean up poo and not hard to scare her out. I just wanted to show off all the intelligent and classic literature I have. That red one down the bottom is Ulysses by James Joyce. If you're not impressed by that either you are far too cultured to read this blog, or not smart enough to know that it's impressive. And quite frankly, I hope my average reader isn't thicker than that particular copy of Ulysses (657 pages, small print).
4) In my shoes. The mouse poo would be bad enough, but I'm guessing I wouldn't know there was a mouse in my shoe until I had squashed it. The worst case scenario would be the ones on the bottom left, because I'm meant to where those ones with white socks, according to fashion. So not only would I ruin a good pair of shoes with squashed mouse, but a good pair of socks as well. At least if I was wearing black socks, no-one would know if had dried mouse blood and guts all over it.
I'm now considering scattering food underneath my fridge. Because the more I think about it, under the fridge is by far the best place for having a mouse in my house.
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